The All-Star Race is over (Smoke won – first win in the 14 – plus his first All Star Race win) and the points race continues. Big Daddy is still at the top of the points race, but had to have treatment for his back this week. Jimmie cut most of his hair off last weekend after the All-Star Race, so he’s sporting a buzz cut done by seven children ages 4 to 8 and a big grin. Carl seems totally in his head and his head seems totally wrong. Jr’s in his head too and his head isn’t any better. It looks to be an exciting race. The Nationwide race last night was pretty good – rain shortened, but good. Mike Bliss won – FINALLY. I’m looking forward to tonight’s race.
Daddy’s in the hospital. He was having trouble breathing Wednesday and an ambulance came and took him to the E.R. As it turns out he was having congestive heart failure – in spite of being told last Thursday by his cardiologist Dr Chandler that he had fluid in his lungs, but it was NOT congestive heart failure. That man makes me angry!!! Anyway, he’s been in the hospital since then. Of course, Kashika was off Thursday and Friday, so felt obligated to be there. As it turns out that was probably for the best in some ways, but it was also aggravating, because as usual, things went wrong and I had to get help from Daniel on a few things. I need to change jobs, because I find I really don’t care about it – about the servers. I want a job where I’m not called in the middle of the night, or on my day off, about something I could care less about. I’d love to have a job writing code. I need to do more of that, I guess, to get good enough at it that I can do it for a living.
I’ve got to do the swimming thing, because this week I got the idea that the R.A. is starting to make itself known and if I start running again, I’ll really know it. My goal is to get healthy and not need the doctor. So I think swimming will help and weight lifting and eating right (which has been a problem) and doing more things for me – taking care of myself. Last week I thought I was having a depression problem. I realized I was being scared of it which was causing part of the problem, and looking at it directly helped me realize, I was kinda bummed, but it’s been a rough year, and I was tired, and still recovering from whatever illness I had. Once I got that through my head and took stock of what was really going on, I understood I’m not depressed, clinically, I am hating my job, I have not had enough fun lately and work is too big a part of my life. I’ve gotta turn that around. The thing with Daddy kinda threw me off with that, so that I missed Jackienet’s daughter’s graduation party. I intended to go, even though it was Friday and I had to work – but I totally forgot about it until I was relaxing on the sofa in my play clothes after work and you couldn’t have paid me to get up, figure out how to get there, then go across town.
I’m missing writing right now too. I keep wanting to write, but keep not having anything to say. I tried last week – or during the week or something – and it seemed horrible. I haven’t looked at it since, but it was coming out all wrong, so it’s made me reticent to try again – but nothing to do, but give it a try since it’s worrying me to not write. It’s 17:30 so I think I’m going to save and add to this later (maybe do a little writing).
The Way I See It!